When I was 15, I decided to audition for Search Light talent show on TV, hoping to get some exposure and feedback. I was nervous but excited, and I sang one of my original songs. The judges loved it, and they gave me four yeses. I couldn't believe it! I was going to the next round! This is a video of the winning song I wrote: Building Walls
That's how my journey began. I made it to the finals of the show, and even though I didn't win, I gained a lot of fans and followers. I started uploading more songs on YouTube and SoundCloud, and I got contacted by a record label. They offered me a contract, and I signed it without hesitation. I was living my dream!
On a more personal note… (summary as told to KHP Kid’s Help Phone
I grew up in a small town setting in Welland, Ontario. I identify as a proud two-spirit person, my heritage being from Six Nations of The Grand River on my mother’s side. My pronoun can be she/her, but at the risk of making it complicated for some, I just see myself as two-spirit.
Being two-spirit is something that my ancestors knew as a tradition and honoured as a gift in their community.
As I grow into the person I’m meant to become, I learn more and more about my spirits and I challenge myself and thoughts to continue on this path, moving forward in this direction. Indigenous people who walk in both worlds — carrying the spirit of both traditional male and female — have strong and powerful gifts, but it comes with its challenges.
I’m learning it’s OK to recognize and learn from these challenges through my learned teachings and stories from my Elders who carry the teachings and knowledge of our cultural history and ways we walked.
The term two-spirit for me is not as simple as some would like it to be. I find, as I grow in two-spirit acknowledgement and practice, there is a lot of misconception.
For example, the idea of two-spirit being genderless or gender non-conforming may only speak to some two-spirit people. There are many amazing examples and identities under the term ‘two-spirit people.’
For me, being two-spirit is a beautiful, empowering term for an Indigenous person who carries the gift of knowing, understanding and walking in both gender worlds.
I remember growing up feeling ashamed of feeling a deeper connection with girls. As a kid I was secretive about it and my experiences. I tried so hard to cover up the person my spirit and inner self was begging me to be. This became a very sad time for me.
When I felt safe enough, I came out as someone who felt a connection with females, as a lesbian. As I came to know more about my culture and its traditions, I found myself overwhelmed with clarity in knowing that two-spirit is something that speaks to my heart and blood memory. It feels like home to me.
When I came out as someone who was in love with another female, it wasn’t all roses and sunshine and there wasn’t a rainbow carpet laid out for me. For some, it was hard to accept, and this put a wedge in some of those relationships.
I’ve had many experiences I’m grateful for in my community and growing as a two-spirit person. It’s beautiful to me to be able to see young Indigenous people coming out with who they are and feeling empowered and loved in the world to do so. There is still a lot of acknowledgement and leg work that is yet to be done, but it’s magical to see it happening.
There was a time in my life I felt no hope. I remember feeling like nobody could understand and there wasn’t anybody in the world that could help the deep confusion and sadness that I once felt as a young person.
Music and art became my medicine. It became something that allowed me to express my darkness and experiences in a way that made me feel empowered and inspired to give something to the world the same way that music did for me.
Where I grew up, there wasn’t a lot of openness and talk or support for being 2SLGBTQ+. But this is an issue for many Indigenous, remote communities and places in Canada today. It’s so crucial for youth to know they’re supported and loved for who they are.
Not every young person is embraced for who they are by the ones they love. They need to feel there is a world outside of the day-to-day one they know — that there is love and a place for them to be who they are in every way. It’s crucial for them to understand their future is beautiful and bright living their authentic selves, and that this has so much to offer and add to the world. They are needed, they are loved and they are heard.
My younger self could never have imagined I would be the person I am today. You are what the world needs in every way with every gift you have. Honour yourself, love yourself and embrace yourself to the fullest, and with every challenge you are meant to use as fuel for your brightest fire. Don’t let anybody or anything take that away from you. Connect with the world when you need it by reaching out, talking, listening, growing, learning and becoming who you are meant to be.
It’s important to know that you don’t need to know right now. It’s OK to feel the state of becoming. You don’t need to have all of your answers, and as a young person, you’re meant to ask yourself questions and challenge yourself. This is good, healthy and a part of your process. Know there is a world waiting for you when you’re ready, and there is a two-spirit community ready to embrace you as you are.
My heart knows and remembers what it was like to struggle deeply as a young person. I now know what I wish I would have back then. I want to encourage youth to feel in charge of their own well-being, even when the world in their moment is not something they have control of. I need them to know there is a world that waits for them to make it a better place with what their specialness has to offer.
To top it off, I married my true love Olympic rugby player Jen Kish in 2021. I am so thankful to live in a country where we could marry lovingly and openly!